Change your mind, not your color

Being completely black, being created by two black people who were created by two black people who were creations of other black people, having a body with the same, identical blood coursing through its veins as its black forefathers', having an uninterrupted gene that can be traced directly back to its African ancestors, the complete indifference between a modern day genome and that of an ancient one's, the keeper of a gene eluded from the alterations of change, the rightful lineage of the cradle of humankind, the true gardener of eden, a pure breed, the epitome of blackness is powerful.

I remember the day my father told me that his mother says that we are descendants of a white man. That somewhere in our ancestral line there was a child born from a black Ethiopian woman and a white Italian man. It was nothing more than a folklore but it was the reason she gave for her own as well as mine and my little cousin's light skinned nature. "Most of us in this family weren't blessed with that gene, you are the lucky few" my father told me. I knew that there was no way to prove it and that she was merely telling him what her mother had told her. The uncertainty of the fact however, didn't keep a smile from making its way to my lips. For some unknown reason I felt special. Not because I was the "lucky few" but because one of my ancestors was something other than black. Somehow I felt different, like that would make me interesting. I saw my skin in a different light. That lighter shade of brown wasn't just a beautiful accident anymore. It was the symbol of two different blood lines that crossed paths hundreds of years ago. it was the mixture of two completely indifferent cultures. It was the progeny of two different continents. It was my new sense of pride despite it being nothing more than an unproven sentiment given by a very old lady.

As a child and even now I find myself being congratulated for my skin colour, meeting different kinds of people that appreciate my complexion. And often, these people would make assumptions that I was in some way mixed. And I welcomed them thinking that they were what would set me apart. It was due to these assumptions that I grew a mindset which associated being light skinned or mixed with beauty and uniqueness. And it was due to those same assumptions that I realized that, that  same mindset was being reflected amongst my community. It wasn't until a few acquaintances with mixed people that I realized it was wrong. I had ignored the most basic principle that I live by. I judged the books by their covers. Upon getting to know them I realized, some of those books were quite shallow and dull and the others were filled with good and interesting values.

After my encounters with them I was forced to realise that the perception I had of myself was incorrect. That the tiniest percentage of my mixed DNA doesn't make me interesting it just makes me part of the continuous cycle of change and evolution. Instead, it's I, it's the way I process thoughts and emotions, the way I perceive the world around me, it's the way my brain cells are wired, it's the way my nerve cells intersect, it's the way my blood runs across my body, it's the way my heart beats when I read poetry, it's the way I turn emotions into art, it's the way I turn questions into essays, it's the many different ways that I process a single sentence, it's the way I turn random ideas into hours long conversations, it is the way I try to hide and express emotions at the same time, it is the way I ask why instead of what, it is my belief that the normal way is ugly and the unusual is beautiful, it is the way I give out acceptance like flyers at a festival, it is how easily I can put myself in another's shoes, it is the way I notice body language instead of words, it's the way I remember body types instead of names and faces, it is the way I speak to subtly teach, it is all of my loud thoughts and emotions, it is who I am that sets me apart and makes me beautiful not the molecules that built my skin tone.

I now realise that the basis of judgement in my community is not that of individuality but that of one's blood line. So it's not about who u are, it's about what ur family is. And the richer or whiter it is, the better. Which is why I was forced to notice what was right under my nose. That we live under this subconscious cloud of self-inferiority that is commonly associated with a people that have an oppressed mindset. This is weird to think about when we consider the fact that Ethiopia was never colonised and therefore never directly oppressed. And yet, we still have a way of thinking, that values other cultures more than our own's. More specifically white culture and white skin tones. Which is why we are more hospitable to foreigners of a different race that are complete strangers and less to our own fellow habesha people. This mind set of inferiority has led to the subconscious desire of attaining a made up level of other races that is supposedly very far away from our own's. This mind set is clearly visible in our desire to attain a lighter skin complexion, hence complementing people with those colours or in all the creams we buy that promise to give us lighter, "fairer" skin. It is also highlighted in the fact that we have standardized beauty as a title given only to people with light skin upto a point that when we see a beautiful dark skinned woman, we somehow feel the need to comment that she is "actually" pretty for a black girl. And don't even get me started on our desperate need to straighten our hair, even when it comes in the expense of the wellbeing of our scalp and hair follicles.

It is this mindset that instills a misdirected sense of power to those that are mixed or light skinned over those that aren't. It is the byproduct of this mindset that makes people complement me instead of my darker skinned sister. It was this mindset that made me say "jokes" like "I wouldn't see you in the dark unless you smiled, lol" to my best friend. It was this mindset that inferiorised ourselves as black people and prioritised other races. But this mindset, this made up level that we are trying to attain is incorrect. Being light skinned should not define beauty or worth. It can not be the reason we give as to why one person is more interesting or powerful than another.

Just look at the modern day art, photography and fashion shows, all featuring people with deep skin tones. These black people are internationally considered beautiful as well as powerful and it's clear to see how they have revolutionized beauty standards. Not long ago, light skinned or not, being black in itself was considered non feminine and ugly. Yet these prominent black figures have transformed the industry to some extent. And due to their amazing works, black people of all diverse skin tones are internationally recognized as beautiful yet within ourselves we have failed to do the same thing. We have failed to recognise eachother as being equally important and worthy. We have disregarded those with darker skin and prioritised those with lighter ones.

So my question is, if the world that once collectively disregarded and shamed us, now embraces us, why we should fail to embrace ourselves the same way? Why should we try to change (bleach) the colour of our skin, when it's our mindset that needs to be changed? Why should we straighten our hair, when it's the way we view it, that needs to be straightened? We need to change the way we prioritise other ethnicities and learn to give all of our beautiful skin tones the respect they deserve. We need to stop giving all the depreciating insults, "jokes" and "nick names" that we give to dark skinned people. We need to stop downplaying their significance and beauty just like the world used to do to us, as a whole. And most of all, we need to realise, accept as well as embrace the fact that all black people and especially those who are blessed with an abundance of melanin, those who are the epitomes of blackness, not just in colour but in spirit, are infact powerful.